So yeah. That happened. And I’m sorry that I’m not sorry. Things got a little crazy. I started grad school which is awesome and hectic and busy (and writing this post just reminded me that I have homework due soon, oof). I got a promotion at work, which made me infinitely more busy. But more importantly (and a lot more sadly) my Mom was diagnosed with cancer.
See, it started sometime in the late summer/early fall – she started feeling “off”. Just not feeling well in general. She had very little appetite and starting losing weight. She had headaches constantly and her arms and legs felt numb and heavy. Being the completely stubborn woman that she is, she put off going to the doctor for a few months and when she finally went, her doctor did some blood tests and put her on a muscle relaxant (yeah, I know) thinking that all of these symptoms were related to a back surgery she had had earlier in the year.
Then one night after work she’d had enough and asked Dad to take her the ER, she was tired of being sick. So they ran tests and more tests and the doctor came in and said that the news wasn’t good. She was in the hospital for a week with a flurry of tests and doctors and oncologists and nurses and CNAs in and out constantly.
Honestly, it seems crazy to me that it’s been less than 3 months since Mom was diagnosed. And truthfully, the news ISN’T good. It’s spread to her liver, but they don’t know where it started, it’s inoperable, and they can’t cure it, they can only slow it down. Mom took a marked turn for the worst last week and was so dehydrated that her body was starting to shut down. We got her to the hospital and she enjoyed another almost week long stay where they saw that her current chemo treatments aren’t working (the cancer isn’t getting any larger, but it’s also not getting any smaller).
I’ve temporarily moved back in with my parents to help take care of her since she’s pretty weak right now and can’t really cook for herself. Since my Dad works second shift, without me there Mom would essentially be alone from 1pm to 1am every day. This way she’s typically only alone for a few hours before I get home from work. Then I make us dinner (or sometimes if I’m traveling Mike will make her dinner, or she’s not super hungry and she’ll just have a sandwich or some soup), wash the dishes, sit and watch TV with her and go to bed usually before 10 o’clock. Which I’m actually starting to like (I was in bed at 9:30 last night which made having to get up at 6:30 not so bad).
So, there’s my absence explained. I can’t guarantee that I’ll be posting any more frequently though.